Where to start?
I took a college level class this semester. Partly to lumber towards the completion of the ever fleeting dream of getting that Associates Degree. But mostly to satisfy a need at work - our yearly goals.
And I hate it.
Absolutely hate it.
I'm sure that part of it is that I resent taking the class for someone other than me. Me is a byproduct on this one.
And part of it is that I just don't want to be behind a desk anymore. I've known that for some time, but it's probably time to take it on and see what happens.
I want to cook. I just want to earn a good, honest living by flipping eggs someplace and coming home to my small haven, enjoying my books and the quiet. There. Now that's out too.
Somewhere, when I wasn't looking or when I didn't care, or when I was too worried about everyone but me, I got caught up in the idea of status quo. I've had the same job for almost 12 years. There's not really anything to complain about, the job pays well, my boss isn't the worst, I've done well in terms of increasing my salary. It just doesn't excite me. And I have some issues with the morality of the business world. I don't want to be in a job where the world will stop turning if something or someone isn't completed on an unrealistic timeline.
Yet here I sit. Well, not at this particular moment, but generally speaking. I'll be heading to my desk on Tuesday (off tomorrow to attend my sister's wedding) and putting myself on the corporate treadmill again.
It's time to get off.
I am so with you on the class thing -
ReplyDeleteAnd trust me - the status quo of the long term employment is a catch 22 and double edge sword -
I never saw the day I wouldn't be with my first employer - the guys I worked with - and worked for me - thought I'd drop over at my desk when I was 80 -
Of course, the company ended that potential four days short of 27 years -
And then Employer #2 fell on soft times and I was put on 'you'll be back layoff' - well, THAT was over a year ago now - not sure I'm going back -
The scary part - and challenging part - and the part that works me up more and more each time is the interview thing for positions - that is if I even get one - or a returned email and/or phone call -
Each one is beginning to wear on me more and more - what word did I say that was wrong - which one would have been right - etc etc etc -
BUT, I can't be something I'm not so I'll muddle through -
Maybe we can do eggs together -